Birthday Weekend Pictures -THE BIKES.

I hate heat-snakes.

Al fleeing to scorpion territory. 

The brothers united. Al and Bubs. 

THE BOOZE.

This guy turns into...

This guy....

THE REST

Me and Super fan slash girlfriend Bert. 

Our hangout.

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Although I have never really placed much of an emphasis on my age in correlation to my personal and professional growth, my 25th birthday marked a significant turning point in my life.

When I first started training in MMA my goal was simply to have a professional bout. Regardless of if I won or lost, I just wanted to fight. No one really understood why I wanted to do it so badly, I just knew that it was something I needed to experience for myself.

I got a phone call from a friend and former teammate of mine one afternoon while I was trying to navigate a 5 ton truck through the narrow streets of Belleville Ontario and simultaneously stuff my face full of chocolate covered almonds in June of 2007..... He asked me if I wanted to fight for King of the Cage in mid July.

I said yes.

Excited, thrilled, and terrified at the same time, I didn't really think twice about the consequences of my actions.

Due to the fact that I had no official rank nor belt in brazilian jiu jitsu at the time, I was told that if I wanted to compete in a professional MMA match that I would not be able to represent nor train with the team I had grown with for over a year and a half.  

Although I knew that there was not enough time for me to have a proper training camp and that I was being brought in as a last minute and 'green' sacrificial lamb to lose to the local and more experienced fighter, the challenge excited me.

I left the gym. I fought. I won.

Similar stories coincide with my 2nd and 3rd professional fights. I made a name for myself by stepping up to face bigger, stronger, and more experienced opponents. I never cared if I won or lost... I knew that my heart and genuine love for fighting could overcome any size differential or gap in experience between my opponents and I.

Eventually I found my place in the top ten of KOTC Canada's rankings and competed for the # 1 contender spot for Freedom Fights in my last outing.

And now? I haven't fought in almost a year and am no longer ranked in the top ten. I was scheduled to fight four times in the last ten months. Three of these bouts fell through due to reasons beyond my control and one fight I dropped out of due to injury.

Needless to say, I am incredibly frustrated with the sport and my current role in it.

I have decided to pursue other goals of mine while the MMA thing sorts itself out. In 63 days I will compete in my first Adventure Race, something that I have always wanted to do.

I have nearly recovered from my hip injury and am looking forward to mixing up my training program and competing in a sport that is entirely unrelated to the one that I have been training for twice a day five or six days a week for the past ten months.... with nothing to show for it.

This is not a retirement speech... I will continue to train in mixed martial arts. I will compete in mixed martial arts again. Soon.

However, in the meantime there are other goals that need to be accomplished, other mountains that need to be scaled. I refuse to wait for one passion to pick up while watching other opportunities pass me by.

This is a new lease on the old me.

After enduring an extremely exhausting and uphill battle for roughly the past two years of his life, my Uncle quietly succumbed to the war that was waged against him at the side of his loving wife and two beautiful daughters… I don’t think he would have wanted it any other way.

A lot of the time we don’t realize how truly special someone is until they are no longer with us. This was never the case with my Uncle Phil… We all knew how hard he worked, how much he had sacrificed, and how much he loved his friends and family.

He is deeply missed.

As my brothers and I escorted our Uncles casket out of the funeral home a song echoed throughout the chapel. It was ‘on the road again’ by Willie Nelson…. For one reason or another I couldn’t help but listen to the words of this song.

With Bubs behind the wheel I had the opportunity to reflect on the time I got to spend with my Uncle, the lives he had touched, and my own existence on our way home.

On my 17^th birthday I got a telephone call from Uncle Phil. He wished me a happy birthday and asked me if I had gotten the card he and my Aunt had sent me. We joked around for a little bit and then he told me that he had something very serious to tell me… I’ll never forget what he said…

‘Ian… you’ve got twelve months to raise as much hell as you possibly can and not go to jail for it, get it all out of your system now. Steal something, get in a fight, and never look back’

Wise words from a wise man.

Then I got to thinking….

Although I have always been somewhat popular and well liked by my peers, I have never really felt that I belonged anywhere.

I come from a loving and supportive family, yet feel alienated from them. I’ve lived with some of the greatest friends known to man, yet have lost contact with the majority of them. I have felt loves like no other and sabotaged them all.

I have slowly removed myself from contact with others. I have gone from working at summer camps and retail stores to warehouses, truck driving, and ‘ultimate fighting’… possibly one of the loneliest professions in the world.  

Having said that… there is a tortuous beauty that can only be found by being part of the crowd yet isolated from it all at the same time, by being so close to thousands of screaming fans yet so far away from their roars. 

I miss the damp walls of the change rooms backstage, the cool breeze that dominates the hallways beneath the raging fans above. I miss the hot lights, the music, the cameras, the wins and the losses. I miss my friend Evan, I miss my Uncle Phil… I miss the beauty of it all.

I need to find help; I need to get healthy… I need to get back in the cage before I get lost in the crowd.

The past few days have been extremely uplifting for me... my brother Bubs was able to take a couple days off of work to come and visit me in Toronto, my back is slowly but surely starting to feel more and more functional with each passing day, and I got to spend some time with my long time sponsor PITCHFORK HARDWEAR and New York Hardcore legends, MADBALL.

I can't say enough about these guys. Warren is by far one of the hardest working guys in the scene and made me feel more than comfortable all weekend. Madball have been around for 2 decades and play every show with the same intensity regardless of if there are 10 or 10,000 people in the crowd.

It is always inspiring to see peoples passion breed positivity. Each night I got to see Warren, Hoya, Freddy, and the rest of the crew on stage I got the impression that there was no other place they would rather be... that type of attitude is infectious. 

Back: Me, Hoya, Mitts. Front: Bubs, Warren, Freddy.

HOYA on stage. 

Me and Freddy on stage. 

SUPPORT THOSE WHO SUPPORT THE SCENE.

WWW.PITCHFORKNY.COM
WWW.ALLINMERCH.COM/PAGE/1448079

The following entry is an interview I did with friend and MMA staple Kyria Christison. Those of you who follow the sport will most likely be familiar with her husband, Dan the 'Sand Man' Christison. Please check out her blog, WWW.THEMMAROADSHOW.BLOGSPOT.COM 

Ian Dawe was kind enough to allow me to ask him a few random questions and give you a little insight into who he is. I met Ian through our mutual friend Evan Tanner. Evan thought a lot of Ian and after getting to know Ian better I can see why. He is intense like Evan was and they have similarities like brothers as much as friends . There are some people that just have a special spark and I saw that in Evan and I see that in Ian as well. I hope you enjoy the question and answer and getting a little insight into Ian and his world. You can follow him and his blog at www.iandawe.com Ian is much more eloquent in his blogging than I am so I am sure every post will be an enjoyable read.

How old were you when you started fight training?

I have been getting beaten up by my twin and older brother for as long as I can remember, but... I would say that my formal fight, or MMA training started when I was roughly 18.


What attracted you to fighting?

For one reason or another I have always felt like professional competition (MMA) was something I needed to experience. Just like writing, it is impossible to lie to yourself when you are locked in a cage or ring with an opponent trained to defeat you.
If you are a liar or a quitter, it will show.
If you are determined and have heart, that will show too.


What type of fighter do you consider yourself?

I would consider myself to be a jack-of-all trades (and am working diligently on perfecting all disciplines). I consider my heart and conditioning to be my greatest assets.


How often do you fight?

When I first got into MMA I was fighting every six months. I would have liked to be more active but I knew that in order for me to compete with the elite guys at this level I needed to pay my dues and put more time into training.
I took some time off from the sport for personal reasons but am happy to say that there are some big things coming up in the next couple months.


How often would you like to fight?

I would like to fight 4-6 times this year.


What would be your dream fight contract?

My goal has always been to fight in Asia. Any contract that allows me to do so would be a dream come true.


Is winning everything?

To be completely honest, losing sucks… it is one of the loneliest feelings I have had the pleasure of experiencing haha. Having said that, I don’t really care about winning or losing, winning definitely isn’t everything. I think if you ask any fighter, they will tell you that they have learned more from their losses than their victories.
My goal is to fight the toughest guys out there and put on a good show, win or lose.


You lived and trained with Evan Tanner and I know that he believed in you (as a person and) as a fighter. Does having someone who has seen the success that Evan had in his career help you believe in yourself as a fighter when you have doubts?

Evans friendship had such a positive impact on my personal and professional life. Evan helped me reach new heights and was always there for me when I needed advice or just someone to listen to.
Evan flew all the way from Oceanside to Gatineau to corner me for my last fight… words cannot express how much that meant to me. Having a man like Evan in your corner is incredibly motivating and inspiring.


You know how Evans death affected people because you were in contact with so many people who cared about him so through your own experience is there anything you would like to say to may be help them feel less of a loss?

I miss Evan every day.
The only thing I could say that may bring some relief to those in mourning is... believe. Evan lived his life by his own terms and was his own man. He felt a deep connection to his past-lives and his path.
There is no doubt in my heart or mind that he is with us.


As far as your fighting do you think one day your fight life will be over or would you like to facilitate your fight career into something else in the fight world?

I have always been interested in teaching. The thought of being able to foster growth is extremely appealing to me… maybe one day later on down the line if my career goes the way I think it will I will open my own gym.


As you can see my blog is full of stories of our new puppy, do you have animals? If so, what kind. If not, do you like animals and if so, what kind?

Growing up in a family of ‘cat people’, we always had a cat or two at home. I don’t have any pets at the moment but I would to adopt an English bulldog.


When did you start blogging and why?

I have been writing for as long as I can remember. However, I only started blogging after living with Evan Tanner. The connection Evan had with his fans through his blogs was amazing.
I also viewed blogging as a great way for me to stay motivated and on track. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself I were to publicly state that I was training like an animal and not doing so.


Do you ever consider what other people think about what you wrote before you post it or are you free of peoples opinion and just hit post?

For the most part I write from my heart and don’t worry too much about what people will think before I hit post. However, I constantly edit my blogs before I post them and have a huge collection of writings that I have never posted… I am not sure what will come of those entries, if anything.


Those of us who are absorbed into this sport still need an escape from time to time. What is yours?

Training two or three times a day five or six days a week is physically, mentally, and emotionally draining. Although I love the sport and training, most of my free time is spent reading or writing. I rarely watch MMA unless a friend, training partner, or potential opponent is fighting.
I am also an Internet junkie and food network buff.



I remember being 25 and thinking about where I wanted to be at the age I am now. It didn’t quite happen like I had planned lol Do you have a life plan or are you just a take life as it comes?

I think I have always had a rough idea of the way my life would pan out, but for the most part I try to take things as they are presented to me and live on a day- to- day basis.


In your mind, how old do you feel?

Another tough question… The easiest way to answer that would be to say that I feel like a 25 year old who has experienced a lifetime of emotion.


You seem like a very deep and thoughtful person to me but how do you see yourself?

This is an extremely tough question for me to answer. I would like to think that I am a thoughtful, rational, and caring person… but the truth is that I often feel like an overly emotional, spontaneous and somewhat reckless human being looking for his place in this world.


Tell us something about yourself that you would like everyone to know about Ian Dawe.

I am generally a shy person and dislike confrontation. I don’t think I have ever sent back a wrong order at a restaurant in my life. I am also a complete germaphobe and somewhat OCD.


You have a lot of meaningful tattoos at such a young age so will you continue to tattoo moments of your life on your body and what happens once you have run out of space?

Thank you. Recording my story has been something I have always felt compelled to do. Tattooing myself seemed like a logical transition from writing to me. I don’t think that I will ever run out of space, but… I would not be disappointed if I did because that would only reflect an abundance of adventure in my life.


I know sometimes the fight fans can sometimes interesting and sometimes rather bizarre. What is your most interesting or bizarre fan story so far?

Luckily I don’t have too many bizarre fan stories…
I consider the majority of my fans to be friends and am ever grateful of their support.
Every now and then I have a run in with someone who follows my blog and am shocked at how much this ‘stranger’ knows about me… then I remember I that I post most of my feelings and day-to-day life online and I feel like the weird one haha.

JYD.